Classish

Here's why I play the classes I play (and why I don't play the classes I don't play).  Just in case someone at Blizzard HQ is curious about the subjective experiences of one nerdish dreamer.

Monk

I think I first fell in love with the concept of the martial artist when Kung Fu: The Legend Continues came on the air my sophomore year of high school.  This, coming on the heels of a much more obscure show called Raven, kindled my interest in what I thought at the time were all things Asian.  Then there was Street Fighter, and Dragonball...and since I'm an autist, I focused to obsession on those few things rather than broadening my horizons.  I digress.

I like playing a character where I can beat things up with my bare hands.  I like playing a character who's badassery stems from his own self-mastery -- rather than tapping into Phenomenal Cosmic Power™, he got where he is through training and will.  Since I play these games to escape the real world, it helps to some extent to play a character who I secretly, in my most private thoughts, believe I could one day be.

And they can throw lightning.  Literal, Palpatine-style lightning.  I don't know where that came from as a design decision but I love it to pieces.

Rogue

Rogues appeal to me for the same reason as monks do.  In fact, I'd long held head-canon that said that combat rogues were really just monks.  (Subtlety rogues, by the bye, are totally ninjas -- or at least they were, until everything that made Sub interesting got changed into a talent.)  So that's reason one: there's a part of me that believes that, through rigorous training, I could be a rogue.

Reason two: rogues can do things other classes can't.  I mean, sure, every other class has their own unique stunts and tricks, but none of them are like a rogue's.  Stealth creates an entirely new game -- now you have the option to bypass enemies rather than having to slog your way through everything.  You can enter the head-space of a trained ninja assassin rather than being forced to be a murder-bot like every single other class.  And picking pockets?  Picking pockets is probably the best trick in the game.

Finally, there's the camaraderie.  Rogues are in the business of dirty business, but there's honor among them there thieves.  Call it professional respect, call it speaking easy, call it omerta, there's something that sets rogues apart, and I like being a part of that.

Paladin

My first character ever was a paladin.  A dwarf named Lennon.  I don't remember what server I was on since I was playing on a friend's account.  This was all the way back in vanilla, when paladins couldn't kill anything even a little bit. 

Anyone remember these days?

When I got my own account, the first toon I rolled was also a paladin.  And I played him, me and my friends, we did dungeons together and there I was, tankin' before I knew what tanking was, trying to hold aggro with my sad array of white attacks and the taunt-that-targeted-allies.  Man, good times.

My point is, it wasn't the gameplay that attracted me to the class.  It was the iconography: the holy warrior, the righteous knight.  I think the main reason I loved Wrath so much was that it felt like an expansion basically designed for paladins, thematically.

I'm also a tremendous fan of the sound this makes.

 It's probably no coincidence that Wrath was when I first managed to level a paladin to the cap, and that paladin stayed my main through Cataclysm.  But then monks came along, and it was all over.

I don't play my paladin much anymore.  Part of it's that I'm not in a paladin-headspace lately, my blog title notwithstanding.  Part of it's that paladins feel really out-of-place in Pandaria.  And part of it's because tanks do shit DPS and I really don't like how Ret plays these days.  Ret used to be hilarious (again, during Wrath).  I think it was the introduction of Inquisition that killed it for me.  Nothing fun about maintaining a self-buff.

So my paladin is in semi-retirement.  I don't know that I'll ever get back to him, given my limited playtime.  Maybe if tanks get their solo damage buffed in the next patch, hint hint.  Or if we go to war against the Legion and a warrior of the Light feels thematically-appropriate again.

Mage

My second character of note was a mage, and the mage that I play today is the same mage as I rolled way back when.  He's been on six different servers and has had most of the professions.  Once upon a time, he was an engineer.  Having those [Spellpower Goggles X-Treme] from level 20 onward made leveling much easier ... back when they gave a big heap of spellpower instead of intellect.

Anyway, I think I liked playing a mage, again, because of the thematics of it.  It was a vestige of my early D&D days, when Raistlin was my hero and the thought of playing a character with godlike power really appealed to me.  I grew out of that around the time I realized that characters with godlike power don't make for very interesting stories.  And so my mage sits in Dalaran, still at level 81, handling all of my Inscription needs.  I'll probably level him just so I can keep up with the professions.

Anything you can do, I can do better.

And I'll admit, on occasion, hitting things in the face with great balls of fire is occasionally hilarious.

Druid

I love shapeshifting, bottom line.  Playing Resto or Balance never held much appeal to me; for me, it's always been about bearkitty.

And then Blizzard went and killed bearkitty.  And now I no longer play my druid.  Coincidence?

Nope.

Hunter

I always had trouble getting into the spirit of hunters, until one day I read an essay someone wrote about how rangers are the special forces soldiers of D&D.  So I invented a character in my head, a Kul Tiras Marine who became subject to the Worgen curse during some action in Gilneas.  I don't think I've ever leveled a character so fast.  Leveling him through Vashj'ir is some of the most fun I've ever had.

Unfortunately, hunters aren't monks.  More to the point, they can't tank, and their stealth is crap.  So while it's true that hunters are the only other class with any kind of unique gameplay (i.e. the pet collecting), they just feel bland to me compared to monks and rogues.  So poor Kormak is probably going to be stuck at 86 for a while.

Warlock

I hated warlocks for the same reason I loved paladins.  I mean, here's a class that's all about stealing things' souls and doing magic with them.  That's really fucking evil, and try as I might, I couldn't come up with head-canon that would let me get around it and actually play one.

Plus, y'know, mages.

But then came Mists, and with it, the [Glyph of Demon Hunting].  Now there was a warlock spec that didn't involve all that soul business.  A warlock spec that was all about demons and demonic energy.  That was transformative.  That could tank (!).  (Sort of.)  This set the stage for me to create a malconvoker character -- a servant of the Light who used the weapons of the Enemy against them.

I haven't done too much with my little gnome lock since MoP actually dropped.  I just don't have time to focus on yet another character.  But man, he was fun while he lasted.

The Others

Why don't I play a warrior, death knight, shaman, or priest?  Well, a lot of it has to do with character.  If I don't have a good character in mind, or if I can't put myself in the shoes of the toon, I just can't get into playing the class.  That's the big thing.

Warriors are fun as hell, not gonna lie.  They're violent, brutal, visceral ... they're the baddest asses around through nothing more than guts and grit and the class really plays that way.  But ... that's all they are.  They have nothing else.

Death Knights skeeve me for the same reasons warlocks did.  They're just evil.  Their powers are evil.  I briefly had a character in mind for a DK, but I got distracted by doing other things, and I haven't revisited.  Probably never will.

Priests ... I like priests.  I do.  They're the closest thing to Jedi that the game has.  But their gameplay is just nothing special.

Finally, shamans.  I actually really dig shamans; they're the closest thing the game has to a true gish.  But the totems.  I hate the totems.  The totem-management minigame totally ruins the class for me.

The Future

Is there a class that could potentially pull me away from monk as my main?  I mean, something that hasn't already been introduced?  It's hard to say.  Off the top of my head, the only one I could think of would be bard.  If Blizzard introduced a bard class that could actually play music, LOTRO-style ... then maybe.

But then again, since a bard tank just doesn't seem likely...

Fo' life.